And so it starts...

Okay, I have been a bit resistant to this whole thing. I mean do I really need "one more thing." But then I told myself...shit, I need an outlet. I need the whole world to know what it is like being stuck in my head! Because the truth is, it's making me CRAZY!!! I am so frickin sick of the people in my life telling me what to do and who to be. I am tired of trying and consequently failing to live up to every one's expectations! People fucking suck ass. Perhaps I should start at the beginning of my miserable life. I will not be finishing it all today by any means. So I suppose if anyone is out there reading my mindless drivel, they will have to keep coming back. And just to beat you smartasses to the punch...I know I should seek professional help. But then, I didn't ask for your fucking opinion now did I?

I was born and concieved at Fort Hood, Texas. I suppose that makes me an Army Brat. But we moved back home when I was about 6 months old...so not really. My bio-dad aka "The Sperm Donator." was in the motor pool in the Army. (He was a real trip.) He and mom were High School sweethearts...and don't we know how that song goes. But they broke up after he graduated in 1972 and left for the Army. So mom is doing great living life and dating other guys. Low and behold bio-dad is home on leave and has the odasity to get in a car wreck. He is at death's door...and weho comes knockin'? Dear old mom. Great, so they are back together. Mom graduates at the age of 17 in 1974. She spend the summer planning the wedding of the year. She turns 18 on August 31st and on September 7....the say "I DO." It is a rather large crowd of family and friends who see the newlyweds off on life of domestic bliss!!! (If only those poor fuckers knew!!)

So within a couple weeks they have moved down to Texas. My poor 18 year old Mom is miles from home for the first time in her life. She is desparately homesick. Bio-dad is a controlling asshole. NO they can't live on base. NO she can't have a job....he'll work a second one. NO she can't drive the car or basically do anything. But by God dinner better be ready and on the table whenever his ass comes strolling through the door regardless of the hour (which was sometimes midnight.) So I bet you can guess what happened next....that's right....me. I was born Nov. 7, 1975. Mom was in labor for 2 days while bio-dad slept in the waiting room. (It's really important to catch up on your zzz's when you have been out whoring around and poking every pussy that holds still long enough.) Now, I know you're thinking that it was common back then for the men to wait in the waiting room....he was allowed in...he didn't want to.

All is well and good. I come home and God only knows the Hell I witnessed over the next few years. BTW, did I mention that bio-dad really liked to hit? Oh yeah, and Mom was his target. Apparently, her hair was made for his pulling pleasure adn her body was a puching bag. What a winner!! As I said before, we moved back home to Indiana when I was about 6 months old. Since the marriage was SOOOO good (cough,cough) why not bring another baby into the family!! Wow, because that could only make things better! And so, Mom gets knocked up again.

This is where I must leave off tune in for more later, or don't....whatever.